I'm 36.  I've been in love more than once and I've done my fair share of traveling.  I've been to Disney World, I've seen the Grand Canyon, and I've partied in Time Square.  I'm 36 and I just had my first bowl of Raisin Bran.

Now I'm the first to admit I grew up sheltered from a lot of different cultures.  The nearest neighbor was a quarter mile away and we got only four TV channels.  Five on a clear night.  I didn't have cable until my sophomore year in college.

I was eighteen when I ate my first bagel, nineteen before I went to my first Mexican restaurant, twenty when I visited an Indian restaurant.  At eighteen, I took my first ride in a an airplane (A VW bug with wings) and at twenty-three I flew in a real aircraft (a 747 maybe?).

It was the day before my driving test in driver's education (age: 15 1/2) when I first sat behind the wheel of a car all by myself.  I drove up and down the driveway.  I was exhilarated beyond belief.

It may seem that I led a completely sheltered life but there were plenty of things I did.  I solved my first Rubik's cube when I was nine.  I wrote my first computer program at twelve and my first computer game (A Wheel of Fortune knockoff) a year later.  I played organized sports every year I can remember and visited the oceans and the mountains from my earliest memories.  I even saw my first set of real boobs before age ten and lost my virginity at sixteen.

I've made beer, had a Mercedes, DJ'ed on the radio, owned my own business and lost it.  I've even been married and divorced twice.  I can bake a helluva cake, hang wallpaper, balance my books, play an instrument, lay ceramic tile, and install a ceiling fan.

I've done a lot in my relatively short life and I've got plenty more to do.  My first bowl of Raisin Bran is just the first step.  Next ... Corn Flakes with bananas ... making cheese ... then maybe publishing a book.

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Southern gal IP:71.xxx.xxx.xxx | 2008-05-07 22:47:19 ... yes, commenting again this evening, but now I've noticed a pattern in your writing. You mention that you've been "divorced twice" a lot - like it's something you definitely want people to know. I'm wondering why. Why do you say that so often? Is it b/c it's such a huge part of your life going through that upheaval twice now? Yes, that can be quite disconcerting to say the least. Did you realize you point that out a lot? Basically, in your bios, you give your age, then that's the 2nd thing you mention. Then here in this post you've mentioned it once again. I don't think that being divorced 2x by age 36 is a good thing in anyone's book & maybe something you should refrain from reminding them of so often. Said as a friend & in a good way - merely some food for fodder, Ross. Signing off: Southern gal p.s. POST Raisin Bran is far superior than Kellog's Raisin Bran. POST tastes better, I don't know why. SAMS CLUB used to stoke only POST but recently they've switched to Kellog's. Figures. Once you get used to something in that store, they pull the ole switch-a-friggin-roo. Costco anyone?? Reply

Southern gal IP:71.xxx.xxx.xxx | 2008-05-07 22:49:15 p.s.s. make that "stock" not stoke, ha. Reply

Ross - Hmm.... IP:98.xxx.xxx.xxx | 2008-05-09 12:28:50 Being divorced twice isn't as bad as it sounds and I freely admit that it's happened to me. It sucks but think of all the experience (read: stories) I have?!?! I don't wear it as badge of honor, but rather as a badge of comedy. I screwed up the first marriage all by myself, but I only take 49% of the credit on the second one. With each marriage, there were some major forces working against us on a personal level, one I haven't touched in my writing because I'm not ready to. Basically, my marriages failing had nothing to do with me being a bad husband or anyone cheating or anything to do with our actual marriages. And in each instance, I wanted to stay together. When we were married, each marriage was right at that time. You know what they say, third time's a charm. Right? Any takers? Oops, gotta go, there's a Seinfeld rerun on . -Ross Reply

Southern gal - Is it ELAINE 'dancing'? IP:98.xxx.xxx.xxx | 2008-06-04 03:50:34 That's the greatest SEINFELD & to think there really are people who gyrate like that on the forever-John-Travolta-wanna-be dancefloor (and I'm including the 'Jane' Travolta's in there too. Well, hell, we can't all be pros & just getting out there having a good time is all that counts. Screw ball room dancing - when it comes to shuffling the sawdust it's whose arms your in that counts the most, I feel. The movie HOPE FLOATS has the best 2-step dancing scene - just right. Your state(s) of matrimony - marriage for those following along in their readers, turn to page 109 :) - explanation...Thanks for delving into that & it's clearer now, sounds better. Yes, GREAT material for stories, some comedy, some just inevitalbly a comedy of errors, but funny all the same, as well as the tragedy & saddness seeping in there b/c how can it but. Any relationship going in the ole porta-potty can be THE... well, let's just say the actual above-mentioned container contents. Don't wish to appear 'Southern gal' crass, although sometimes life just calls for it - have to call a spade a spade, but the old double standard is still out there concerning women & expletives. I personally think the subject matter calls for a good WHAMMY every now & then. Not talking RAP cursing which I can utterly NOT stand...every 2nd or 3rd word & it's so redundant to the point of idiocrasy. Know what I mean? Now I'm off to check whether you left a comment on the ole CLEAVAGE post & my womanly take I dished out on that one... 10-4 Cavins! Reply

Southern gal IP:71.xxx.xxx.xxx | 2008-05-16 08:54:20 http://rosscavins.com/content/view/108/54/ Nope, I don't see any retorts on your CLEAVAGE MAKES MEN STUPID, but I assume you're busy oggling ;). Please attempt to raise your eyes for one moment to experience my profound literary enlightment. It could possibly give you a different perspective. Continuing... Some women want to be known for their cleavage alone, but there are many others who wish to be known & remembered for the entire package. These are the women who leave men MUCH more worthwhile than in a state of "blathering idiocrasy" as you say. What man wants to appear like a frothing, drooling dog going through society glued to every set of BAZOOKA BOOBS jigglin' & a janglin' his way??! You're gonna end up with lots of stains on the front of your shirt & royal pains from strained necks trying to follow the path of the bounce-a-long body traffic. Speaking of traffic, I haven't even mentioned the car wrecks these morons get into straining to gander another long look at Goosey-Lucy's GANDERS. Unbelievably hilarious that one false look can end up costing them $1000's in damage. They don't even KNOW this woman & are risking their safety & others on the road to turn around & get that second long stare...... BAM~~~~~!!!!!!! Chick could have been the biggest fruitcake at Christmas & every holiday thereafter, but she got ya! Now they have the front bumper to prove it & maybe someone else's rear bumper. Not good. So, w/ guys is that a running joke, no big deal when stuff/damage like that happens? Just asking - trying to understand the mentality. Like I said in the last comment, I totally see your point & agree to a certain extent. When I get my blog going, hopefully soon, I wrote a piece on my term BOOBO being the new word for BIMBO because I feel the COCONUTS, or even Watermelons, craze has gone totally off the charts lately w/ all the frigging IMPLANTS. It's like a woman isn't rating anymore unless she has an entire produce section sticking out N,E,S, and West in whatever she's wearing. Signed: IMHBO (In My Humble Boobal Opinion!) Reply

Southern gal IP:71.xxx.xxx.xxx | 2008-05-19 17:52:34 "Now I just need to sift through the records of who hasn't had implant surgery... " Should I address this to Dr. Ross?!You've got records?? Or access to records?! Either impressive, or weird... or obsessed, ha. Well, by now we all know it most definitely falls into the latter! lol Ok, Mr. Back-trace, the IP thing, yeah that's scary, but what is one going to do if they wish to comment on your witty retorts? I'm seriously wondering if that is the reason there aren't more comments on your posts and those of the SCRIVEL.com site. Y'all are both using this format. Just more food for thought. I've commented so often now you must be gorged! :) Reply

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