Movie Review: Disturbia (2007)
Although not an original idea (see Hitchcock: Rear Window), Disturbia has some interesting characters and plot twists. Shia LaBeouf is a disturbed teenager who is sentenced to house arrest and witnesses (or imagines) a murder in his neighbor's house. Befriended by a...
The Greatest TV Intro Ever
It's not Cheers or Friends or even MASH. It's not Who's The Boss or Leave It To Beaver or The Brady Bunch. Nor is it Scooby Doo or Monday Night Football or Arrested Development. No, the greatest TV show intro ever edited is none other than ... The Six Million...
Movie Review: Ocean’s Thirteen (2007)
Ocean's Thirteen is the third in a series of con films beginning with Ocean's Eleven and Ocean's Twelve. Ocean (played by George Clooney) organizes a group of grifters and attempts to swindle a casino owner. Excellently produced and every bit as good as Ocean's...
Bed Security
There's a lot I miss about being married or in a serious relationship. Cuddling on the couch when we'd watch TV, cooking a grandiose meal for two, taking naughty showers together. And even providing bed security. Women know what I'm referring to, it's something...
The Great Diet Switch
Diet Mountain Dew The biggest moment in my life wasn't my sixteenth birthday. It wasn't the junior or senior prom. It wasn't the day of my weddings (nor my divorces). It wasn't even the day I lost my virginity. The biggest moment in my life was the day I made the...
Movie Review: Hot Fuzz (2007)
Bloody Hilarious Hot Fuzz is a British comedy brought to you by the director and writer of Shaun of the Dead, this movie is drop-dead hilarious and wonderfully well-produced. One of the funniest movies I've seen in a long time, Hot Fuzz serves up that dry humor the...
Scrabble on TV
I was playing Scrabble yesterday and I began to wonder if they televised the Scrabble championships. They have them, you know, because I've read about them. But do they televise them? Do they provide play-by-play with color commentary? Announcer Voice: Hello and...
Movie Review: Spider-Man 3 (2007)
Gayness Personified Spider-man 1 didn't trip my trigger and Spider-man 2 slightly redeemed the series. But Spider-man 3 was the gayest of all three. With such cheap tricks as an unexplained meteorite, short-term amnesia and hullaballoo science via a particle...
The Yard Art Phenomenon
A Garden Gnome. An epidemic has swept the South, one of epic proportions that threatens the very underpinnings of good taste. We've all seen it and we've all commented on it, it's the phenomenon of yard art and it's a plague that seems to have set in for the long...
The Lyric Mangler
It's a complete mystery to me. How my five year old nephew can remember the words to every song he hears. How he can recite entire passages from movies verbatim. I don't understand, he must have a gene I don't. I can't even sing a Christmas song completely through...